June Update

Come with me on a journey…

A journey that started four years ago when I thought I knew what my life would be like. Oh friends, how I had absolutely NO idea what God actually had planned.

A journey where God, day after day, drenches me with an inexpressible joy. A joy that is overflowing in my heart and makes my smile radiant. A joy where I wake up every morning happy and ready to serve my Savior.

A journey that has taken me deeper into the ocean of God’s heart and His relentless love—a true, beautiful love more wonderful than anything I could ever imagine.

A journey where I am daily learning to utterly depend on a faithful God and to trust in HIS ways and plans over my own.

A journey where my Good Shepherd at times has lead me through valleys’ of death and green pastures with still waters

A journey where I have accomplished, with the Holy Spirit dwelling within me, parts of my calling and mission beyond my wildest dreams.

A journey that requires me to pick up my cross and follow my Savior. To daily pour out more and more of my self.

A journey that is far from over…

It seems so surreal to me that it is already June. This June is extra special because it is June 2011. When I was a little, wide eyed, carefree, barefoot, dancing around the playground with flowers in my hair—fifth grader dreaming about the wonders (*cough* unrealistic expectations) of middle school and the joys to come of one day being a high school student, I figured out what year I would graduate high school. June 2011 seemed so far away back then. Yet, here I am, 18 years old, holding tightly to the few days left I have of my childhood, but it keeps slipping through my fingers.

However at the same time, I can barely contain my excitement and my imagination is going wild with the possibilities of this new chapter of my life story that I am about to embark on. This year I have been learning about how God is the author of our life stories and how He promises, when we fully give up the pen to Him, to write a thrilling, one-in-a-million, set apart adventure story. Even in the short time that I have surrendered my life to Christ, He has taken me on the most incredible adventure. I have been loving on 1 Corinthians 2:9 this month:

No eye has seen, No ear has heard, no mind could fully understand, the amazing plans that God has for those who love Him

God has plans to use our lives in ways we could never fully understand. The life God has planned for us is not something we can accomplish in our own strength, wisdom, and love.

God has a plan for my voice. Even when the world says I’m not good enough.

God has a plan for my writing. Even when I don’t believe it myself.

God has a plan for my passion for public speaking to advance HIS Kingdom. Even when my friends and family think I should use it to advance my own kingdom.

God has plans for all the gifts and talents. Even when people say that my vision of impacting thousands or millions of people for the Kingdom of God is foolish dreaming and ridiculous. Yet, God has so graciously entrusted with me with all these gifts and He is going to work through me to do the impossible. Because is anything too hard for God?

For it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose ~Philippians 2:13

There is a quote I have written on my study bible (it is about ready to fall apart because I use it so much) that says, “No matter what we know about Jesus now, there is always more to be discovered and experienced. In fact, even eternity won't be enough to fully grasp His insurmountable glory and brilliance.”

God is an endless frontier. He is a frontier that no one has reached the end of or fully explored. I am constantly challenging and daring myself to go further. There is always more to be discovered and experienced. And so I devote my life to running deeper and deeper into this endless frontier. That is truly the set-apart adventure. Because as we go further into the never-ending ocean of God’s love the waters get sweeter and sweeter, life gets fuller and fuller, and my soul continues to overflow with an indescribable peace.

Hebrews 11. I read that chapter over and over when I need inspiration to keep running after God. God is worth it. Look at what some of the Bible Greats did when they surrendered their lives to God and trusted in His power in their lives to do the impossible…

Through acts of faith, they toppled kingdoms, made justice work, took the promises for themselves. They were protected from lions, fires, and sword thrusts, turned disadvantage to advantage, won battles, routed alien armies. Women received their loved ones back from the dead. There were those who, under torture, refused to give in and go free, preferring something better: resurrection. Others braved abuse and whips, and, yes, chains and dungeons. We have stories of those who were stoned, sawed in two, murdered in cold blood; stories of vagrants wandering the earth in animal skins, homeless, friendless, powerless—the world didn't deserve them!—making their way as best they could on the cruel edges of the world. ~Hebrews 11:33-38

When you aim for the impossible, you are usually misunderstood, scoffed at, and at odds with the rest of the world. But what if our so-called impossible dreams are not impossible at all? That is the truths that I am holding on too as I enter into this new season in my life.

For the rest of June I will continue to blog about my reflections as I begin this new chapter of my life story and as I watch my childhood come to an end. God has put this subject on my heart and hopefully I can do my best to find the words to explain it all. It’s now officially summer for me. I am done with high school and my first two years of college. I have exactly three months before I head off for a new adventure in Seattle. I have no idea what the future holds but I do know: that it is wonderful to be in the hands of the living God…it’s a hallowed adventure of a lifetime.

Believing in the Impossible by the power of our Great God,

Heidi
 

 
(Pictures from Audrey Hephurn Complex tumblr)

Worshiping through the Storms of Life

I’m sorry this blog took so long to post. Life has been beautifully chaotic and blogging has not been a super high priority on my To-Do-List. However, summer is so close, which means weekly blogging is more of a possibility. I wrote this blog a little over a week ago. I thought about breaking it up into two parts but it needs to stay in its full and original form. I understand that its really long but when your pour out your heart about topics like worshiping God through the storms of life there tends to be a lot that needs to be said…



It is POURING outside right now. Seriously, I have literally never seen it rain so much in my life. This is an odd statement for this born and raised Northwest girl to declare because I should know all about the rain. Just now though, all the water of Heaven decided to fall upon this tiny coffee shop; like the sky is crying in despair. Luckily, I am sitting by a massive window safe from the rain in a warm, oversized, comfy chair; a front row seat to watch the rain fall. And then out of nowhere it stops. After a solid two minutes of massive down pour…silent peace. The storm didn’t move on without leaving behind its mark. The parking lot is soaked and huge puddles are scatted everywhere. Unfortunate costumers waddle into the coffee shop completely drenched and seeking a much needed (and deserved) cup of extra hot coffee. I give them a laughing smile and they can’t help but smile back—life is funny like that. The truth is you can always find things to smile and laugh about even after being drenched by a massive storm.

As I turn my attention back out the window, I can see the sun forcing its way through the hovering dark, rain clouds. The clouds are moving on to rain on some other place. Yet, the sun stays behind to clean up—drying up the mess the storm left. It is almost odd to see the bright yellow sun after the sky turned black and rain pounded the ground seemingly out of control. At last, a beautiful rainbow has been painted in the sky. It is one of those flawless rainbows. A perfect arch filling up the whole sky. There is no doubt as I stare out the window; the storm has past. I continue to type away on my laptop in the calm after the storm. And as I witnessed this bizarre weather play out before me, I cannot help but think about how this relates to the past week in my life…

It has been a tough week for me personally, for my community, and for the world. I have never been so aware of spiritual battles and warfare in my life. Spiritual warfare is very real. In the past week I have had to endure two hometown teen suicides, one of them being a very good childhood friend of mine. I have watched horrific videos and images of Joplin, Missouri being totally destroyed and left in pieces by the deadliest single U.S tornado since modern record-keeping began 61 years ago. This natural disaster has killed at least 125 people. And finally the false “rapture” claim that the world was going to end on May 21, 2010. It is not tragic that this didn’t happen—I knew it wasn’t going to happen. Jesus makes it perfectly clear that, “No one knows about that day or hour, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son, but only the Father” (Matthew 24:36). The end of the world could happen in our lifetime, a million years from now, or even tomorrow. The truth is that we do not know. We cannot predict the end of the world. And those that try to predict it are false prophets. The thing that is tragic about the false call on the Judgment Day is for people who don’t know Jesus or the Bible and who actually believed this guy. Many people are now disillusioned and have lost faith in God over some man’s false prediction over something the Bible clearly states cannot be predicted.


A spiritual world, spiritual warfare, and spiritual battles are VERY real. There is so much going on all around us that is unseen. There is a war going on between two conflicting kingdoms. The first, the Kingdom of God! God wants everyone to be saved. This is the Kingdom of love, life, and light. The other kingdom is the kingdom of Satan. Satan wants every person in the world in hell. He wants your soul and your faith. This is the kingdom of evil, death, and darkness. Our lives here on earth are during wartime, NOT peace time. Peacetime is coming, the day we see Jesus face to face and hear, “well done Good and Faithful servant”, but that time is not now.

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ~Ephesians 6:10-12

Satan is heartless. He could care less about the things he destroys or the people he takes from us to try to shake our faith. That is why it is so important to worship God through the storms, the trials, the hardships, the suffering, and the heartache that comes with life. When we worship we are looking Satan straight in the face and saying “You cannot take my faith. You may take my friends, my family, my house, my money, my job, my possessions, my health, but I will NOT let you take my faith. It is the best way to fight spiritual warfare. We will NOT let Satan get what He wants—our faith in God. We will stand strong. I will stand strong in the strength that God so freely pours into me through the Holy Spirit. I will stand in the rain.

Here a just a few of my favorite stories and encouraging scriptures in the Bible that are all about praising and worshiping God through the storms of life.


The first chapter of Job is a story about Satan questioning whether God’s most loyal servant, who was full of integrity, had genuine faith in God or loved God only because God had blessed him with success, family, protection, a house, and money. Satan declares that if God was to take away all of this Job would surely curse God. God let Satan test Job. In a matter of moments every changed in Jobs life. Four of Job servants come at the same time to announce that Job has lost all his farmers and animals, fire came and killed all his sheep and shepherds, and that he lost all his children in a wind storm. Job hears all this tragedy and the first thing he does is fall to the ground and worship God. He says, “The Lord gave me what I had, And the Lord has taken it away. Praise the Name of the Lord”.


Therefore, since God in his mercy has given us this new way, we never give up. We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed. We are perplexed, but not driven to despair. We are hunted down, but never abandoned by God. We get knocked down, but we are not destroyed. Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies. But we continue to preach because we have the same kind of faith the psalmist had when he said, “I believed in God, so I spoke”…And as God’s grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory. That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. ~2 Corinthians 4:1;8-10;13;15-18

But you belong to God, my dear children. You have already won a victory over those people, because the Spirit who lives in you is greater than the spirit who lives in the world. ~1 John 4:4

Acts 16. Let me tell the story told in Acts 16. This is my favorite story in the book of Acts. Here we find Paul and Silas being beaten for preaching the Gospel in Philippi (the people and town that Paul wrote the book Philippians for) they're then thrown into prison. Locked up, guarded and chained deep within the dusty prison and all hope seems to be lost for Paul and Silas. Uncertain whether death would be their fate or being forever locked in prison; there doesn’t seem to be any reason to worship God in this dark, cold prison. However that is exactly what Paul and Silas do! Through out the night, even late into the night, Paul and Silas are praying and singing hymns to God! Wait a second…let’s break this down. Worshiping God after being beaten? Even while being chained and locked up in a prison? Yup, Paul and Silas after being beaten and thrown into prison are worshiping God.


But the story doesn’t end there Acts 16: 26-28 explains, “Suddenly, there was a massive earthquake, and the prison was shaken to its foundations. All the doors immediately flew open, and the chains of every prisoner fell off! The jailer woke up to see the prison doors wide open. He assumed the prisoners had escaped, so he drew his sword to kill himself. But Paul shouted to him, “Stop! Don’t kill yourself! We are all here!” Paul ends up leading the jailer to salvation. My favorite verse in this whole story is the second part of verse 26, “the doors immediately flew open and the chains of EVERY prisoner fell off”. Paul and Silas worshiping God didn’t just free themselves from the chains of the prison but every other prisoner who was chained up. How incredible to think that us worshiping God through the storms of life could not only free us from the bondage of brokenness, pain, hopelessness, despair but also the people around us who are in bondage!! The story doesn’t end there, in total despair of the idea of being punished for the escape of all the prisoners, the jailer is about to commit suicide, yet Paul not only convinces him to not commit suicide but also leads the jailer to salvation in Christ. All of this happened because Paul and Silas choose to worship God through the storms and trails of life.


Another reason I love Acts 16 is that so many times we as Christians (and I am extremely guilty of doing this) tell God we refuse to worship Him, refuse to serve other hurting people, refuse to trust Him until he sets us free from despair, heals our brokenness and makes us whole again. Then we will go and be a blessing to others. Then we will worship Him. But God says no, no, no, YOU go be a blessing, YOU go serve, YOU lift your hands in worship even when its hard, YOU love the other hurting, broken people around you and then, by going, by praising me even amidst the storm you will find your healing and restoration. This is how God works. It is clearly shown in Acts 16. Paul and Silas chains are not broken, they are not given freedom, their wounds are not washed until after they worship God through the storm--when there seems to be absolutely no rescue on the way. God works backwards compared to the world that says, “take care of your self first, and then help others. God says, “YOU take care of others even if you feel broken, YOU worship me even through the trials and storms, and I will take care of you, I will make you whole, I will heal you.”

Take your eyes off your own pain to serve others. Take your focus off your own brokenness and worship me. When you do you will be shocked to find your own heart healed, your own chains broken, your own prison cell door open. You might even cause the chains of others to be broken too, you might even be used to stop someone from ending their life, and you might even be used to bring others to trust in God. How awesome that God wants to use me even in my brokenness to reach out to others who are hurting. How awesome that God gives me the strength to worship Him during the darkest of nights when I cannot find the strength.


So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold—though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world. You love him even though you have never seen him. Though you do not see him now, you trust him; and you rejoice with a glorious, inexpressible joy. The reward for trusting him will be the salvation of your souls. ~1 Peter 1:6-9


My heart is breaking; for myself, for my friends and family who are hurting, for the people in Missouri, and for the world. I wonder how much I can possible take. How many trials and hardships can take place in one week? How much longer will it keep raining? When will the sun break through? My soul aches and I have no idea what to do with all the brokenness in the world and in my own life. Sometimes it feels like I cry out to God and am met with only silence. When all hope seems to disappear I can’t help but wonder where God is, why He hasn’t done anything to stop the madness going on all around me. Yet, I know that somehow I will get through it all…because I have a loving, faithful and good God. A God that is known for carrying me when I don’t have the strength to walk. A God that will see me through. A God who promises to never leave me or forsake me.

A question I get asked a lot being in ministry work is “why do bad things happen to good people?” Maybe the better question to ask is Where is God when good things happen to bad people like me, broken, dirty and sinful? This is the beautifully response Anne Voskamp (author of One Thousands Gifts, another book I HIGHLY recommend) wrote to answer that question.

“Where is God when bad things happen to the only kinds of people there are, not good people, all of us, all people like all people, fallen and badly bruised and bad, none of us ever pure good? Where is God? God is on the Cross, and God is in the tomb, and God is upon the Stone rolled away. God is on the throne and God shows us His scars and God holds the bottle to catch all our tears because He can’t bear to let our grief spill careless and lost. Where is God when bad things and good things happen to all the bad people made good by Him? This is where He is and always is: The problem of evil is answered by the presence of Emmanuel: God is with us. We may sorrow but we still sow. and though we are broken, we still bend and begin; we do our work though we weep. We tell our hurts we must do the task at hand if we hope to harvest; though we may not feel like it, the fields need seeds. God is with us. And it’s His tender with-ness that binds up the wounds”.

…As mediate on all this as I continue to find meaning and understanding to all that has happened in my life this week. I am brought back to reality by the gentle tap on the shoulder by a sweet older lady who comments on the beautiful rainbow in the sky, which I have been staring at for the past few minutes. I smile and tell her I love rainbows because they remind me to remember God’s promises. That sun will come after the storm. Just beyond the clouds hope is found.


My eyes shift to the cherry blossom trees lining the parking lot. Cherry blossoms trees are the best part of spring time. The gorgeous pink flowers bring color to the constant grey Spring showers. I can see the droplets that remain on the blossoms from the rain storm. Despite their small size, they are holding dozens of tiny droplets which are sparkling and glistening in the emerging sunlight. We as Christians, are a lot like cherry blossoms after a rainstorm, with Christ we can bring beauty and color to life’s storms and trails. And despite our frail and fragile lives, God gives us the strength to endure dozens of trails. And as we endure and continue to trust and worship God through life’s storms we tend to sparkle with a radiance that only comes from the light of God shining upon us and within us.

Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God's work from beginning to end. ~Ecclesiastes 3:11

God makes beautiful things out of the dust. God makes beautiful things out of us. Even through the storms of life. God is always working, from beginning to end; the sun will shine once again. So, I lift my hands and raise my voice to worship God who is ALWAYS worthy of my adoration.

Singing in the rain,

Heidi

(I don't own any of the pictures that I used for this blog. All of the pictures I found online just searching on google pics for different "rain pictures")