I will start off by saying that I absolutely did NOT want to write this post; and as always God had other plans. Let just say writing this has humbled me in ways only God can….
“But there is a spirit within people, the breath of the Almighty God within them, that makes them wise” ~Job 32:8
God’s spirit, His breath, is within me. It is what fills every inch of my heart. It is what gives me the ability to love and serve and most of all it is what speaks through me (or writes). My source of strength and wisdom comes from the Almighty God. I totally understand what Corrie Ten Boom is felling when she said, “Sometimes I get a headache from the heat of the halo that people put around my head”. People continue to believe that somehow everything I do is something out of my own strength or ability. Or that every convicting blog I write is from my own wisdom.
Well…let me tell you what the REAL Heidi Johnson is like. She absolutely HATE’s when things do not go the way she plans them in her head. Everyday she struggle with these verses…
“Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails ~Proverbs 19:21
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, says the LORD ~Isaiah 55:8
“Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what You will” ~Mark 14:36
The REAL Heidi Johnson would rather wake up early to go to Starbucks and depend on her grande peppermint mocha to give her the energy to get through the day instead of waking up early to do a morning devotion to trust and depend on Jesus to give her all the energy and strength she will need.
The REAL Heidi Johnson knows that there are TONS of innocent children that are dying due to sever malnutrition and eating out of dumpsters. Children who don’t know the Gospel or that they have a Heavenly Father that so deeply loves them. Children who are unloved and are longing for a forever family. Children that have to grow up way to soon in order to take care of their family because their parents died of AIDs. Children who are forced into sexual slavery or child soldiers...
At the end of the day, even though she know all of this, the REAL Heidi Johnson wonders if these children are really worth leaving a comfortable lifestyle, a life where she has every worldly thing going for her, a life where she is living the “American Dream”. These children’s situations break her heart but she is too selfish to give up her “perfect” worldly life to pour out love and share the Gospel with these children. But, it does sound nice to talk about giving up her life for them. However, deep down she knows she doesn’t have the courage to actually do it.
The REAL Heidi Johnson is lazy, selfish, and has a massive ego. The good news is that Jesus Christ IN Heidi Johnson is the total opposite of all of these things. Jesus in Heidi Johnson knows what to do with her shortcomings and sins. She knows when you confess them to God, Jesus Christ washes them in HIS Blood that He shed on the cross. They are forever cast into the deepest sea. And Heidi Johnson gets to stand before God as white as snow.
Jesus in Heidi Johnson stays up all night to pray on behalf of the atheist man she met at Starbucks; begging God for a second chance to get to meet him again and share the Gospel with him. Jesus in Heidi Johnson can say and write things that even leave her in awe and inspired. Jesus in Heidi Johnson gives her the confidence to trust that God works everything out for the good of those who love Him and that she doesn’t need to worry or even make plans.
Jesus in Heidi Johnson reminds her that there is energy and strength that He longs to fill her with that no sugary $4 mocha can ever give her. Jesus in Heidi Johnson knows that it doesn’t matter if everyone thinks she’s crazy and has lost her mind because she is always posting “Jesus Blogs”. Jesus in Heidi Johnson tells her that her life is only completely full, joyful and fulfilled when she gives it up for the least in the world. And finally Jesus in Heidi Johnson tells her that in her weakness, she is made strong through Him.
My friends, hear me out, we are ALL sinners who need to understand the most powerful and beautiful love that was EVER shown on this earth. Jesus Christ died to lift us out of this horrible, ugly and dead life of sin, selfishness, and ego and instead into His wonderful LIGHT!
For you are a chosen people, belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light ~1 Peter 2:9
The bible calls the REAL Heidi Johnson self or flesh…
“Jesus said to them, if anyone wants to be my follower, he must deny self, pick up his cross daily and follow me. If you try to hang on to your life, you will lose it. But if you give up your life for my sake *(like say…to love on broken, unloved children)*, you will save it. ~Luke 9:23-24 (the * part added by me)
This 5 part series is called Answering the call to embark on the Set Apart Adventure. The Set Apart Adventure is following Jesus. Honestly, it is the adventure of a lifetime. But Luke 9:23-24 says that in order to answer this call and start embarking on this adventure we MUST deny self (in my case the REAL Heidi Johnson), pick up my cross daily (notice that it says daily…this is a conscious decision we must make every morning) and only then can we follow Jesus and embark on the Adventure.
“God rescued me from the grave and now my life is filled with LIGHT” ~Job 33:28
God rescued my soul from an eternal death and has given me the gift (seriously, it’s a gift…I did absolutely nothing to deserve it) of a forever life with Him in Heaven. Not only that but He has saved me from living a “dead” life on earth filled with darkness and only focused on self. He instead has OVERFLOWED my life with His wonderful light! This light comes from Jesus living in your heart. He teaches you how to truly be alive! Jesus wants to live in your heart. “Behold, I stand at the door and knock” He says, “If anyone opens the door, I’ll come in”.
Will you open the door of your heart and let Jesus come in, change you, and fill you with His wonderful light??
Monday, August 30, 2010
Saturday, August 28, 2010
Part 1~ Creating a Holy Temple
God has given me a five part series to write called: Answering the Call to embark on a Set-Apart Adventure. The first part of this series is Cleaning and Preparing the Sanctuary /Temple for the Most High King. Before I start I want to tell you why I do this. Why I blog. Why I take the time to pray throughout this whole process and truly make sure that everything I write is exactly what God has asked me to write…
Honestly, I can’t stop writing. The Holy Spirit puts something so strongly on my heart and it’s impossible for me to not do my best to put it in words. I can’t turn it off. At least God hasn’t turned it off yet. I go through situations, I go through experiences, I see everyday miracles, and I go through life with my sweet Savior, Jesus Christ. Lately, God has been opening my eyes to the Heavenly realm and the spiritual battle surrounding us. I NEED to write it, all of it…it’s like breathing.
I was prinking (praying and thinking biblically or meditating on scripture) a month ago on a simple, campfire worship song called Sanctuary. It was the main chorus that was running through my head: “Lord, prepare me to be a sanctuary. Pure and holy, tired and true. With Thanksgiving I’ll be a living Sanctuary for you”. I just sang that part over and over to myself and let it sink deep into my heart. And then I realized, as Christians we are to be living temples or Sanctuary’s. The Most High King wants to dwell within us! It is an amazing truth.
Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him, For God's temple is holy, and that temple you are. -- 1 Corinthians 3:16-17
I started to pray to God about how grateful I was that He is dwelling within me and is therefore with me wherever I go. But then God whispered to my heart, “Heidi, yes I am dwelling within you but it is SO messy in here. Sin, worldly desires, unforgiveness, bitterness, and pride are cluttering and defiling this temple that is supposed to be a Holy place! It is time for some much needed summer cleaning”
I was so taken aback by what God said! God, how do I possibly begin cleaning my inner temple to make it fit for a King? I started to look around my room. I could barely see the floor. It was quite a horrible sight to see…it looked like my closet exploded, my desk was stacked a mile high with papers, there was a mountain of books my by bed, old mugs half filled with two day old peppermint tea, and my walls were over crowded with pictures and random things: the area as a whole was extremely overwhelming!
“Look around your room my precious daughter, this disorderliness and messiness is what your inner temple feels like for me. Start with cleaning up your earthly sanctuary and I will teach you during that process how to clean your inner temple!”
Jesus is my Solid Rock, my Cornerstone. I am always amazed at how He fills me with SO much wisdom and understanding right when I need it most. So quickly either in written words or spoken; He always puts the right words in my mouth or heart.
The process of cleaning your inner (and physical) temple is time consuming, scary, and EXTREMELY messy…you are being forewarned!! However, it is always, always necessary. Because remember that as Christians throughout our whole lives God is molding us to be more like Jesus. It is a beautiful process of being refashioned into an utterly new creation.
When I was cleaning my room I had three boxes; keep, throw away, and donate. Cleaning your inner temple is the same process. I prayerfully went before God and let Him clean; let HIM choose what needed to go, what needed to stay, and what needed to be given away. For example, my devoted time in the morning and night for bible and prayer time needed to stay. On the other hand, my unforgiveness needed to go.
*A quick side note: unforgiveness is an extreme spiritual poison. It NEEDS to be gone as soon as possible, it is so harmful. I love what Corrie Ten Boom says on forgiveness, “I could not do it [forgive]. I was not able. Jesus in me was able to do it. You see, you never touch so much the ocean of God’s love as when you love those who hurt you”.*
This was the prayer I prayed to get rid of the unforgiveness: Father, clear my heart from any jealousy or unnecessary hurt. You have other plans for me. Plans for good and not harm. You have something custom designed for me. I can trust fully in you!
Something that had to be given away (donated) was all that God had been showing me the past year. I often times get scared to share the things that God reveals to me…mainly for fear of rejection, but God does not want me to keep it to myself but to proclaim it on the mountain tops and tell of the wonders of our God. (For those curious readers: Yes, that is another reason why I am writing this five part series)
Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth. My health my fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart. He is mine FOREVER!...How good is it to be near God. I have made the Sovereign Lord my shelter, and I will tell everyone about the wonderful things you do. ~Psalm 73:25-26:28
I want to be able to say…”I desire you more than anything on earth…” and truly mean it and have that truth reflect in my life. God is the strength of my heart and my first and forever love. He has been my shelter during every one of life’s storms and raindrop moments. My prayer is that God continues to fill me with boldness to not let fear stop me from sharing the wonderful things He has done in my life. I long to know Jesus, serve Jesus, and to become more like Jesus.
During this time of cleaning and preparing my body to be a living temple for the King of kings and Lord of lords; David’s plea to God became the cry of my heart…”Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” ~Psalm 139: 23-24
Now I have inner temple that is fit for my sweet Jesus and a clean room which is my earthly sanctuary and temple where I go away to meet with God. A room for bible studies, devotions, prayer, journaling and writing, TONS of prinking, worship...and it even has become a place where God presence has been dwelling so strongly because I have been keeping it clean, not polluted by the world (that's right ABSOLUTELY NO teen magazines , Z100,etc allowed in my room) it is always ready to be used to meet with God that my sister uses my room for her devotion time too!
After this season of my life I can candidly say that…
“I am one of the rare and nearly extinct breed of God lovers who still lives and breathes what she believed back then. Only now it is more real than ever because it’s in me. God’s Spirit is in me, changing me. Not just around me, influencing me.”
Honestly, I can’t stop writing. The Holy Spirit puts something so strongly on my heart and it’s impossible for me to not do my best to put it in words. I can’t turn it off. At least God hasn’t turned it off yet. I go through situations, I go through experiences, I see everyday miracles, and I go through life with my sweet Savior, Jesus Christ. Lately, God has been opening my eyes to the Heavenly realm and the spiritual battle surrounding us. I NEED to write it, all of it…it’s like breathing.
I was prinking (praying and thinking biblically or meditating on scripture) a month ago on a simple, campfire worship song called Sanctuary. It was the main chorus that was running through my head: “Lord, prepare me to be a sanctuary. Pure and holy, tired and true. With Thanksgiving I’ll be a living Sanctuary for you”. I just sang that part over and over to myself and let it sink deep into my heart. And then I realized, as Christians we are to be living temples or Sanctuary’s. The Most High King wants to dwell within us! It is an amazing truth.
Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy him, For God's temple is holy, and that temple you are. -- 1 Corinthians 3:16-17
I started to pray to God about how grateful I was that He is dwelling within me and is therefore with me wherever I go. But then God whispered to my heart, “Heidi, yes I am dwelling within you but it is SO messy in here. Sin, worldly desires, unforgiveness, bitterness, and pride are cluttering and defiling this temple that is supposed to be a Holy place! It is time for some much needed summer cleaning”
I was so taken aback by what God said! God, how do I possibly begin cleaning my inner temple to make it fit for a King? I started to look around my room. I could barely see the floor. It was quite a horrible sight to see…it looked like my closet exploded, my desk was stacked a mile high with papers, there was a mountain of books my by bed, old mugs half filled with two day old peppermint tea, and my walls were over crowded with pictures and random things: the area as a whole was extremely overwhelming!
“Look around your room my precious daughter, this disorderliness and messiness is what your inner temple feels like for me. Start with cleaning up your earthly sanctuary and I will teach you during that process how to clean your inner temple!”
Jesus is my Solid Rock, my Cornerstone. I am always amazed at how He fills me with SO much wisdom and understanding right when I need it most. So quickly either in written words or spoken; He always puts the right words in my mouth or heart.
The process of cleaning your inner (and physical) temple is time consuming, scary, and EXTREMELY messy…you are being forewarned!! However, it is always, always necessary. Because remember that as Christians throughout our whole lives God is molding us to be more like Jesus. It is a beautiful process of being refashioned into an utterly new creation.
When I was cleaning my room I had three boxes; keep, throw away, and donate. Cleaning your inner temple is the same process. I prayerfully went before God and let Him clean; let HIM choose what needed to go, what needed to stay, and what needed to be given away. For example, my devoted time in the morning and night for bible and prayer time needed to stay. On the other hand, my unforgiveness needed to go.
*A quick side note: unforgiveness is an extreme spiritual poison. It NEEDS to be gone as soon as possible, it is so harmful. I love what Corrie Ten Boom says on forgiveness, “I could not do it [forgive]. I was not able. Jesus in me was able to do it. You see, you never touch so much the ocean of God’s love as when you love those who hurt you”.*
This was the prayer I prayed to get rid of the unforgiveness: Father, clear my heart from any jealousy or unnecessary hurt. You have other plans for me. Plans for good and not harm. You have something custom designed for me. I can trust fully in you!
Something that had to be given away (donated) was all that God had been showing me the past year. I often times get scared to share the things that God reveals to me…mainly for fear of rejection, but God does not want me to keep it to myself but to proclaim it on the mountain tops and tell of the wonders of our God. (For those curious readers: Yes, that is another reason why I am writing this five part series)
Whom have I in heaven but you? I desire you more than anything on earth. My health my fail, and my spirit may grow weak, but God remains the strength of my heart. He is mine FOREVER!...How good is it to be near God. I have made the Sovereign Lord my shelter, and I will tell everyone about the wonderful things you do. ~Psalm 73:25-26:28
I want to be able to say…”I desire you more than anything on earth…” and truly mean it and have that truth reflect in my life. God is the strength of my heart and my first and forever love. He has been my shelter during every one of life’s storms and raindrop moments. My prayer is that God continues to fill me with boldness to not let fear stop me from sharing the wonderful things He has done in my life. I long to know Jesus, serve Jesus, and to become more like Jesus.
During this time of cleaning and preparing my body to be a living temple for the King of kings and Lord of lords; David’s plea to God became the cry of my heart…”Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting” ~Psalm 139: 23-24
Now I have inner temple that is fit for my sweet Jesus and a clean room which is my earthly sanctuary and temple where I go away to meet with God. A room for bible studies, devotions, prayer, journaling and writing, TONS of prinking, worship...and it even has become a place where God presence has been dwelling so strongly because I have been keeping it clean, not polluted by the world (that's right ABSOLUTELY NO teen magazines , Z100,etc allowed in my room) it is always ready to be used to meet with God that my sister uses my room for her devotion time too!
After this season of my life I can candidly say that…
“I am one of the rare and nearly extinct breed of God lovers who still lives and breathes what she believed back then. Only now it is more real than ever because it’s in me. God’s Spirit is in me, changing me. Not just around me, influencing me.”
Sunday, August 8, 2010
Beauty in Brokeness
“The truth of the matter is...LIFE IS HARD. We do not choose our lives. If you are truly living by faith and relying on Jesus Christ, then does it really matter if life is hard? or accepted? or pleasing to others? NO, it only matters to Christ and Christ alone. So, the bottom line...who are you here to serve?” ~Anonymous
Being real with you all: it was a tough night in the Johnson household yesterday. Satan and the sinful flesh inside everyone seemed to be running around wild and out of control. Selfishness was the heart of the problem for all of us. However, there were also uncontrollable events (that life always seems to through at you) that set off this very unpleasant night.
Yet, on nights like yesterday, I always remember two important things:
1) To trust God, knowing He will see me through!
Being real with you all: it was a tough night in the Johnson household yesterday. Satan and the sinful flesh inside everyone seemed to be running around wild and out of control. Selfishness was the heart of the problem for all of us. However, there were also uncontrollable events (that life always seems to through at you) that set off this very unpleasant night.
Yet, on nights like yesterday, I always remember two important things:
1) To trust God, knowing He will see me through!
Perhaps faith is like that—it is not easy. But, in a way, it is very simple. We cannot do it by ourselves, that is obvious. But when we turn to Lord God Jehovah, he gives us what we are lacking—faith. That is exactly where I am tonight. It is not easy. Nothing about this day has been easy. But I will not make it through the night without faith. Please Lord, increase my faith that I might survive until morning. (Three Days, by Melody Carlson)
2) That we serve a God who takes broken things and broken people and transforms them into something beautiful and whole.
God is seriously an expert at using some of my darkest and tough nights and situations and using them for my good and for advancing His Kingdom here on Earth. Yesterday it was VERY obvious that I didn’t deny self…my pride and selfishness were on full parade in my life. And let me tell you that can quickly make a mess of things. By the time I realized what I had forgotten to do (deny my self and let Christ sit at the throne of my day) the damage was done. Throw in some unfortunate circumstances and three other people and you have a huge disaster just waiting to happen.
By the end of the night, I was on my face just begging God for forgiveness. I know that when I live for myself and my sinful desires it breaks God’s heart. But last night I could feel that I was hurting Him. I have never felt that way before. That very feeling is what brought me to my knees last night, just crying out for forgiveness. I HATE hurting God. Yet, the moment I cried out for forgiveness that horrible feeling was immediately gone. Instead, it was replaced by His supernatural grace, love, and patience.
Honestly, God shows me so much patience: especially when He has to remind me of something that He has taught or showed me a million times—like denying self everyday. He pours our His patience and all the resources of Heaven to help me fight and conquer the sin in my life. Last night it was the strength and power that I have from Christ that crucified my prideful and selfish heart and put Jesus Christ back on the throne of my heart.
Last night I remembered that God’s grace is deeper than the deepest ocean. And that no matter how far away we are from God, His love goes farther still! PRAISE THE LORD!!
Here is a quote from the book I am reading right now called, Under the Overpass, by Mike Yankoski. (I highly recommend this book; it is about the adventures of two college guys who choose to be homeless for six months to see if Jesus is truly everything they say He is)
“For some reason, I hardly ever admitted when things weren’t going well. Instead, I usually glossed over my struggles with an easy cliché like “it’s all good” or “hanging in there” and thought nothing of it. Psalm 34:18 says “The LORD is close to the broken-hearted.” I wonder if pretending you’re not broken keeps God at a distance.”
You need to realize your brokenness to truly understand your need for a Savior. How desperately we all need Jesus Christ in our lives and to praise God for His amazing love and power to use broken people and transform them over time to be more and more like Him. It is absolutely beautiful! Thank You, Thank You, Thank You, Jesus!!
Father, let me keep coming before you as the broken and sinful person we both know I am. Make me whole and new. Please, don’t let me EVER think that I can make it on my own and that I don’t need you to make me whole. Oh how I need you!! In order to be made new and whole I must constantly come before your throne and ask you to transform me to be more like Jesus. Less of me and more of YOU! Amen
Friday, July 30, 2010
Truly, the "harvest is plenty and the laborers are few"
I do not know the man that wrote this but I received it today. All I know is that I know the feeling that Chad writes about...about seeing the church playing in the river and seeing the lonely Christ all alone working in the fields and being in between him and the church. Hearing the cries of those who have not been helped or heard the good news of salvation. Please read this and share it. We need to respond...we need to take up our cross and be those that are helping Christ in the fields of the fatherless, the fields of the lost....
This has really changed me. I cannot begin to put it in words! It is long, but I PROMISE you it's worth every minute you give to read it...
Chad Taylor:
A Panoramic Vision of THE Harvest
I have had this repeated vision over and over the last 22 years since I was saved. I saw impressions of it when I walked across America in 1990 with only a sleeping bag and a "Jesus Saves" sign blazed across my backpack in neon red. I saw the vision while walking the streets of this nation's largest cities long after midnight.
It engraved itself in my consciousness as I preached on the streets of Seattle at the age of 18 with only the homeless and the gutter as my congregation. I have seen the same vision while ministering in the sultry south on the mean streets of Atlanta where racism and religion still prevail. Over and over the past 22 years this panoramic vision of "the harvest" has left its enduring mark on my soul, and finally I am to make it plain. Make it plain so that those that read it can run—run into this field the Bible calls, "The Harvest."
Vision of the Field
I saw a field going on endlessly as far as the eyes could see. It reminded me of the gravity of Abraham's vision in Genesis when God said, "Then He brought him outside and said, "Look now toward Heaven, and count the stars if you are able to number them" (Genesis 15:5). That's how boundless this harvest field was. It stretched on in every direction, until it left you dizzy with the sheer magnitude of it all.
As I continued to look down the endless rows of wheat, I saw as it were a figure far off in the distance, working. The heat waves coming from the hard-packed ground made it difficult to see, so I stepped into the field to look closer. I glanced down at the furrows and rows and I noticed much of the ground was hard-packed and fallow, yet other smaller parts were dark with fertile soil and tilled. Large sections of the field that I could see from my vantage point were unharvested, and the ground showed signs of neglect—fallow, hard and dry.
I continued to walk toward the figure that I had first noticed deep in the field. I heard a peculiar sound as if it were coming from all directions. Like a distant whine or a baby crying? I stopped to listen more closely. I heard it more audibly now as I paused—it was a mournful cry, like someone weeping. As I listened more intently, I heard the Holy Spirit say to me, "It's the cry of the harvest; a forgotten, abandoned harvest—like a baby left discarded from its mother!"
I could clearly hear the mourning and crying from this wide harvest field as if it was crying out to be redeemed, accepted and received. I was shaken and my heart broke as I heard the pitiful cry of the harvest all around me. The words of Job sounded like a crashing cymbal in my spirit, "O earth, do not cover my blood; may my cry never be laid to rest!" (Job
16:18). This harvest of disquieted souls refused to be discounted, and their plaintive cry came before me.
Vision of the River
I continued walking and the cry from the harvest seemed to wane; it appeared that the figure in the field was now even farther away. As I continued to walk down the rows which were mostly dry and cracked, unexpectedly I caught the scent of water. I abruptly turned toward the breeze that carried the smell of fresh water wafting through the air and I began to run toward it. I pushed through row after row of heavy-laden stocks of wheat bent over and bowing low to the ground. I sprung right through one more row, and there it was—the river.
I was taken aback in this series of endless rows of grain and then, abruptly, this gurgling river. Before I could run and leap into the cold water, drinking from its welcoming shore, I looked at what was before me and I was still. In the river and along its sides were hundreds if not thousands of men, women and children jumping, swimming and laughing.
I yelled from where I was near the edge of the harvest field only a few dozen yards away, but they could not hear me. The people were deaf to my cries as if I was not even present. Didn't they see the figure working in the distance all alone? Didn't they hear the despairing cry coming from the very field that was all around them? Didn't they see the massive field that was left unattended and forgotten? Couldn't they see me just a stone's throw away, waving my hands and shouting? Some were even gazing intently into the river as if they were hypnotized by its ebb and tide. It was uncanny.
A Sudden Anguish Swept Over Me at a Revelation of the Immense Labor Left Undone
The river was so intoxicating and appealing, it took a great deal of effort not to be drawn closer by its strong allure and promise of refreshing. I was about to step in closer when the sound of crying and mourning grew louder. The cry of the harvest pierced my heart again and I turned back toward the field. I saw the lonely figure in the now-setting horizon and was determined to forge ahead.
I looked back one more time at the crowds and the river. I was amazed that they were somehow completely unaware of the vast expanse of field that surrounded them on both sides. The persistent cry of the harvest could not reach their ears; either because of the festivities or a mystery that I did not understand. I tried shouting again and pointing toward the figure alone in the field, but no one even glanced at me or heard.
A sudden anguish swept over me at a revelation of the immense labor left undone as the field stretched out for endless miles around me. Solomon, in his equally endless wisdom wrote, "There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under Heaven" (Ecclesiastes 3:1). I knew beyond any doubt at this moment it was time to labor. The fields were ready. They were ripe.
I called to mind another Scripture that leapt from the pages of the Bible, "Whoever gathers in the summer is a wise son. Whoever sleeps at harvest time brings shame..." (Proverbs 10:5). Lord, never let me be put to shame!
Vision of the Headstone
I finally turned my back on the river and took in the rich harvest anew before me. Jesus' exhortation to His early disciples in Matthew 9:37-38 was now in striking clarity as I gazed out at the field, "The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest." I asked myself that very moment, "Lord, did I forget to pray?"
I began to walk doggedly toward the lonely figure, at times stopping because of the heat. Then unexpectedly, I stumbled upon what seemed like a stone or some kind of marker off ahead in the dirt. It looked like a carved stone or rock, apparently there for some inherent purpose. I noticed bouquets of flowers, all kinds of memorabilia and small personal items scattered around. As I drew up closer I knew what it was—a grave marker like in a cemetery, and clearly inscribed on it were the words, "The harvest is past, the summer has ended, and we are not saved" (Jeremiah 8:20).
I was aghast. Below this agonizing inscription I saw specific years of the calendar etched in its stone: 1610, 1689, 1705, 1790, 1830, 1875, 1920, 1945, 1970, 1989, 2000 and so forth. Other dates were recorded below but were worn and illegible. I knew what they were—times and seasons, dates and generations where a great cycle of harvest had come upon the earth and had not been seized; a kairos moment that had come and gone.
One More Date Was Carved in the Headstone: 2020
At the very top of the marker was one more number as if it had just been cut into the stone—2020. I was cognizant in that moment that through the years of 2000 to 2020 was another divine cycle or season for the harvest of souls in the earth. We are in the middle of that cycle now in 2010. 2020 was a divine mile-marker in the world's history and also a great signpost for Heaven as well. I dropped to my knees right there in the field and cried aloud, praying, "Lord, send out laborers! Lord, here am I. Send me!"
Flowers and trinkets adorned the headstone as if generation after generation had paid homage to times past, rather than seizing the moments that they had then. Historic opportunities had come to win the world to Christ but had passed them by. I was melancholy and sad as I watched this memorial stone fade behind me while I continued to walk deeper into the field.
What I saw next was unforgettable: The headstone was now only a memory when out of the heat-waves and swaying wheat I saw an angel and a woman.
Vision of the Angel and the Woman
The woman was dressed in what appeared to be Biblical-era clothing and was gleaning in the field behind what was clearly an angel. Her faded lavender dress was laden with wheat as she filled a large basket beside her. A red sash was around her waist. I knew exactly who it was—Ruth! The Ruth I had been recently reading about and ministering from in the Bible. That vivid illustration in God's Word where Ruth followed the reapers in Boaz's field was right there before me. I remembered the Scripture in Ruth that stated, "And she went, and came, and gleaned in the field after the reapers" (Ruth 2:3).
It was such a sight to see the angel a few yards ahead of her with a scythe cutting the wheat in bushels. They both worked in tandem, reaping the wheat seamlessly in a synchronized motion as if it was rehearsed. I stared in awe at this amazing sight and I knew it was prophetic; a divine message played out in this drama unfolding before me. Then the words of Jesus in Matthew added one more stroke to this masterpiece I was beholding, "The harvest is the end of the world; and the reapers are the angels" (Matthew 13:39).
Ruth is a picture of an end-time Church following the Kingdom of God into the fields of nations, preparing the way of the Lord. A time was now upon us that we would work with the angels of Heaven invisibly in the immense field that lies before this present generation. Heaven and earth would work in unprecedented unison to see it reaped.
I remembered in Jewish tradition that on every Pentecost the book of Ruth is read. On Pentecost in the Upper Room when they were waiting on the promise of the Holy Spirit's power that would take them around the world, the story of Ruth was repeated. As I stood in this vision, I saw it too. We are the Bride that would find her Boaz, her Christ, in the threshing floor of nations. That's where the lovers of God would truly be found. I prayed that He would find me there, too—in the field.
Vision of the Clouds
Abruptly and without warning, a dark cloud came down blackening the air with strange smells and acrid smoke. I was nearly blinded, my eyes watering as this strange cloud descended. It took all of my senses not to give into a sudden feeling of drowsiness; my eyes grew heavy and I could barely walk. I was like a drunken man weaving back and forth in between the rows of wheat, staggering. Voices came from somewhere in the smoke; it sounded strangely like music, and then at other times it was incoherent. I was disoriented and confused, and I desperately tried to find my way out of the cloud.
As this disturbing experience continued, a specific Scripture arrested me, "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." (Matthew 26:41).
I fell to my knees as this terrible smoke swirled around me, and I began to pray loudly, "Lord, here am I, send me! Lord, lead me not into temptation but deliver me from evil!" As I continued praying, a breeze which transformed into a gust of wind began to blow and the cloud retreated. I knew this wind was the "Ruach HaKodesh" or the Spirit of God. This was the same wind that brought the dead bones to life in Ezekiel and the same wind that blew through the Upper Room and sent them outward to the uttermost parts of the world. It was that same Spirit which was clearing the dark smoke from the air, now giving me a clear vision of the harvest field again and the lone figure in the distance. I had my senses back.
As I looked out again at the endless rows of wheat, I saw similar dark little clouds appearing, swirling. These clouds were distractions and mirages that caused many to withdraw or to simply freeze and do nothing. I recalled another Scripture as I stood where the cloud had once been only seconds ago, and I prayed it out loud, "(God) hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the Kingdom of His dear Son!" (Colossians 1:13).
Vision of the Saints
I continued to walk now with more resolve and I began to see large patches of field already reaped in sheaves. Every hundred yards or so I would come upon another swathe of harvest that was thoroughly cut down and laying in perfect piles of sheaves bound tightly in bundles. I marveled at the harvested portions of field and wondered out loud who could have done it. I looked more closely and I saw memorial markers or capstones near the middle of these cleared out areas. I walked up to one in particular in a very large and wide harvested area, and it read simply, "Corrie Ten Boom."
I walked on further and I read another capstone in a cleared area nearby, and it read, "William and Catherine Booth." Each area of field had a small memorial to the Christian that had harvested so diligently in it. Most of the names I had never heard of before. Others I had only heard or read before in books and memoirs such as, "Jim Elliot," "Hudson Taylor," and "D.L. Moody."
I continued to walk, observing each harvested area, and finally I stopped to pray in another clearing. I prayed out loud, "Lord, let there be a small memory of my work on this earth as well. Whether it is to be read by others or not, let my short life mean something even as these others before me have." I remembered the prayer of David and I said it out loud: "Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered—how fleeting my life is." (Psalm 39:4)
Vision of the Lonely Christ
I stubbornly left this last patch of harvested wheat, not wanting to depart, somehow thinking that one of these great harvesters would step out of the field to meet me. No one did. I was once again drawn to the lonely sentinel that worked in the field ahead. As I focused on the personage again, it didn't seem as far as it was before. I could now make out the face and appearance. It was Jesus. He was sweating and dirty, working vigorously and tirelessly. He looked up at me and wiped the sweat from His brow, and said, "So, pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest."
He had such a sad look on His face, yet I knew He was happy to see me. I had pressed on and not been deterred even by the glorious things I had glimpsed—the river, the saints before me, the angels and the woman that harvested. I had pressed into the field even beyond the frightening cloud that had tried to stop me. He spoke again, "Awake you that sleep, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give you light" (Ephesians 5:14). I was awake.
I knew this was a prophetic panorama of the great harvest of humanity that Jesus had spoken of in the Bible. It was also a stark revelation of the utter lack of laborers despite over 2,000 years of enterprise. Now after all that I had seen in this vision, nothing could compare to the lonely anguished look on Jesus' face as He invited me into "the fellowship of His suffering." I remembered in the garden of Gethsemane He had asked His disciples to pray with Him in that, His darkest hour. Now, He is not only requesting us to pray with Him but to work with Him in the harvest fields of the world—the colossal expanse of human life where the more than half of earth's populations has never even heard of or extolled the name of Jesus Christ.
As this vision was ending, Jesus stopped toiling for a moment and looked back at me with a look of kindness. He handed me His threshing instrument and said almost in a whisper, "Ask of Me, and I shall give you the heathen for your inheritance, and the uttermost parts of the earth for your possession" (Psalm 2:8).
I bowed down greatly.
Chad Taylor
Consuming Fire Ministries
Email: info@consumingfire.com
This has really changed me. I cannot begin to put it in words! It is long, but I PROMISE you it's worth every minute you give to read it...
Chad Taylor:
A Panoramic Vision of THE Harvest
I have had this repeated vision over and over the last 22 years since I was saved. I saw impressions of it when I walked across America in 1990 with only a sleeping bag and a "Jesus Saves" sign blazed across my backpack in neon red. I saw the vision while walking the streets of this nation's largest cities long after midnight.
It engraved itself in my consciousness as I preached on the streets of Seattle at the age of 18 with only the homeless and the gutter as my congregation. I have seen the same vision while ministering in the sultry south on the mean streets of Atlanta where racism and religion still prevail. Over and over the past 22 years this panoramic vision of "the harvest" has left its enduring mark on my soul, and finally I am to make it plain. Make it plain so that those that read it can run—run into this field the Bible calls, "The Harvest."
Vision of the Field
I saw a field going on endlessly as far as the eyes could see. It reminded me of the gravity of Abraham's vision in Genesis when God said, "Then He brought him outside and said, "Look now toward Heaven, and count the stars if you are able to number them" (Genesis 15:5). That's how boundless this harvest field was. It stretched on in every direction, until it left you dizzy with the sheer magnitude of it all.
As I continued to look down the endless rows of wheat, I saw as it were a figure far off in the distance, working. The heat waves coming from the hard-packed ground made it difficult to see, so I stepped into the field to look closer. I glanced down at the furrows and rows and I noticed much of the ground was hard-packed and fallow, yet other smaller parts were dark with fertile soil and tilled. Large sections of the field that I could see from my vantage point were unharvested, and the ground showed signs of neglect—fallow, hard and dry.
I continued to walk toward the figure that I had first noticed deep in the field. I heard a peculiar sound as if it were coming from all directions. Like a distant whine or a baby crying? I stopped to listen more closely. I heard it more audibly now as I paused—it was a mournful cry, like someone weeping. As I listened more intently, I heard the Holy Spirit say to me, "It's the cry of the harvest; a forgotten, abandoned harvest—like a baby left discarded from its mother!"
I could clearly hear the mourning and crying from this wide harvest field as if it was crying out to be redeemed, accepted and received. I was shaken and my heart broke as I heard the pitiful cry of the harvest all around me. The words of Job sounded like a crashing cymbal in my spirit, "O earth, do not cover my blood; may my cry never be laid to rest!" (Job
16:18). This harvest of disquieted souls refused to be discounted, and their plaintive cry came before me.
Vision of the River
I continued walking and the cry from the harvest seemed to wane; it appeared that the figure in the field was now even farther away. As I continued to walk down the rows which were mostly dry and cracked, unexpectedly I caught the scent of water. I abruptly turned toward the breeze that carried the smell of fresh water wafting through the air and I began to run toward it. I pushed through row after row of heavy-laden stocks of wheat bent over and bowing low to the ground. I sprung right through one more row, and there it was—the river.
I was taken aback in this series of endless rows of grain and then, abruptly, this gurgling river. Before I could run and leap into the cold water, drinking from its welcoming shore, I looked at what was before me and I was still. In the river and along its sides were hundreds if not thousands of men, women and children jumping, swimming and laughing.
I yelled from where I was near the edge of the harvest field only a few dozen yards away, but they could not hear me. The people were deaf to my cries as if I was not even present. Didn't they see the figure working in the distance all alone? Didn't they hear the despairing cry coming from the very field that was all around them? Didn't they see the massive field that was left unattended and forgotten? Couldn't they see me just a stone's throw away, waving my hands and shouting? Some were even gazing intently into the river as if they were hypnotized by its ebb and tide. It was uncanny.
A Sudden Anguish Swept Over Me at a Revelation of the Immense Labor Left Undone
The river was so intoxicating and appealing, it took a great deal of effort not to be drawn closer by its strong allure and promise of refreshing. I was about to step in closer when the sound of crying and mourning grew louder. The cry of the harvest pierced my heart again and I turned back toward the field. I saw the lonely figure in the now-setting horizon and was determined to forge ahead.
I looked back one more time at the crowds and the river. I was amazed that they were somehow completely unaware of the vast expanse of field that surrounded them on both sides. The persistent cry of the harvest could not reach their ears; either because of the festivities or a mystery that I did not understand. I tried shouting again and pointing toward the figure alone in the field, but no one even glanced at me or heard.
A sudden anguish swept over me at a revelation of the immense labor left undone as the field stretched out for endless miles around me. Solomon, in his equally endless wisdom wrote, "There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under Heaven" (Ecclesiastes 3:1). I knew beyond any doubt at this moment it was time to labor. The fields were ready. They were ripe.
I called to mind another Scripture that leapt from the pages of the Bible, "Whoever gathers in the summer is a wise son. Whoever sleeps at harvest time brings shame..." (Proverbs 10:5). Lord, never let me be put to shame!
Vision of the Headstone
I finally turned my back on the river and took in the rich harvest anew before me. Jesus' exhortation to His early disciples in Matthew 9:37-38 was now in striking clarity as I gazed out at the field, "The harvest is plentiful, but the laborers are few. Therefore pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest." I asked myself that very moment, "Lord, did I forget to pray?"
I began to walk doggedly toward the lonely figure, at times stopping because of the heat. Then unexpectedly, I stumbled upon what seemed like a stone or some kind of marker off ahead in the dirt. It looked like a carved stone or rock, apparently there for some inherent purpose. I noticed bouquets of flowers, all kinds of memorabilia and small personal items scattered around. As I drew up closer I knew what it was—a grave marker like in a cemetery, and clearly inscribed on it were the words, "The harvest is past, the summer has ended, and we are not saved" (Jeremiah 8:20).
I was aghast. Below this agonizing inscription I saw specific years of the calendar etched in its stone: 1610, 1689, 1705, 1790, 1830, 1875, 1920, 1945, 1970, 1989, 2000 and so forth. Other dates were recorded below but were worn and illegible. I knew what they were—times and seasons, dates and generations where a great cycle of harvest had come upon the earth and had not been seized; a kairos moment that had come and gone.
One More Date Was Carved in the Headstone: 2020
At the very top of the marker was one more number as if it had just been cut into the stone—2020. I was cognizant in that moment that through the years of 2000 to 2020 was another divine cycle or season for the harvest of souls in the earth. We are in the middle of that cycle now in 2010. 2020 was a divine mile-marker in the world's history and also a great signpost for Heaven as well. I dropped to my knees right there in the field and cried aloud, praying, "Lord, send out laborers! Lord, here am I. Send me!"
Flowers and trinkets adorned the headstone as if generation after generation had paid homage to times past, rather than seizing the moments that they had then. Historic opportunities had come to win the world to Christ but had passed them by. I was melancholy and sad as I watched this memorial stone fade behind me while I continued to walk deeper into the field.
What I saw next was unforgettable: The headstone was now only a memory when out of the heat-waves and swaying wheat I saw an angel and a woman.
Vision of the Angel and the Woman
The woman was dressed in what appeared to be Biblical-era clothing and was gleaning in the field behind what was clearly an angel. Her faded lavender dress was laden with wheat as she filled a large basket beside her. A red sash was around her waist. I knew exactly who it was—Ruth! The Ruth I had been recently reading about and ministering from in the Bible. That vivid illustration in God's Word where Ruth followed the reapers in Boaz's field was right there before me. I remembered the Scripture in Ruth that stated, "And she went, and came, and gleaned in the field after the reapers" (Ruth 2:3).
It was such a sight to see the angel a few yards ahead of her with a scythe cutting the wheat in bushels. They both worked in tandem, reaping the wheat seamlessly in a synchronized motion as if it was rehearsed. I stared in awe at this amazing sight and I knew it was prophetic; a divine message played out in this drama unfolding before me. Then the words of Jesus in Matthew added one more stroke to this masterpiece I was beholding, "The harvest is the end of the world; and the reapers are the angels" (Matthew 13:39).
Ruth is a picture of an end-time Church following the Kingdom of God into the fields of nations, preparing the way of the Lord. A time was now upon us that we would work with the angels of Heaven invisibly in the immense field that lies before this present generation. Heaven and earth would work in unprecedented unison to see it reaped.
I remembered in Jewish tradition that on every Pentecost the book of Ruth is read. On Pentecost in the Upper Room when they were waiting on the promise of the Holy Spirit's power that would take them around the world, the story of Ruth was repeated. As I stood in this vision, I saw it too. We are the Bride that would find her Boaz, her Christ, in the threshing floor of nations. That's where the lovers of God would truly be found. I prayed that He would find me there, too—in the field.
Vision of the Clouds
Abruptly and without warning, a dark cloud came down blackening the air with strange smells and acrid smoke. I was nearly blinded, my eyes watering as this strange cloud descended. It took all of my senses not to give into a sudden feeling of drowsiness; my eyes grew heavy and I could barely walk. I was like a drunken man weaving back and forth in between the rows of wheat, staggering. Voices came from somewhere in the smoke; it sounded strangely like music, and then at other times it was incoherent. I was disoriented and confused, and I desperately tried to find my way out of the cloud.
As this disturbing experience continued, a specific Scripture arrested me, "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak." (Matthew 26:41).
I fell to my knees as this terrible smoke swirled around me, and I began to pray loudly, "Lord, here am I, send me! Lord, lead me not into temptation but deliver me from evil!" As I continued praying, a breeze which transformed into a gust of wind began to blow and the cloud retreated. I knew this wind was the "Ruach HaKodesh" or the Spirit of God. This was the same wind that brought the dead bones to life in Ezekiel and the same wind that blew through the Upper Room and sent them outward to the uttermost parts of the world. It was that same Spirit which was clearing the dark smoke from the air, now giving me a clear vision of the harvest field again and the lone figure in the distance. I had my senses back.
As I looked out again at the endless rows of wheat, I saw similar dark little clouds appearing, swirling. These clouds were distractions and mirages that caused many to withdraw or to simply freeze and do nothing. I recalled another Scripture as I stood where the cloud had once been only seconds ago, and I prayed it out loud, "(God) hath delivered us from the power of darkness, and hath translated us into the Kingdom of His dear Son!" (Colossians 1:13).
Vision of the Saints
I continued to walk now with more resolve and I began to see large patches of field already reaped in sheaves. Every hundred yards or so I would come upon another swathe of harvest that was thoroughly cut down and laying in perfect piles of sheaves bound tightly in bundles. I marveled at the harvested portions of field and wondered out loud who could have done it. I looked more closely and I saw memorial markers or capstones near the middle of these cleared out areas. I walked up to one in particular in a very large and wide harvested area, and it read simply, "Corrie Ten Boom."
I walked on further and I read another capstone in a cleared area nearby, and it read, "William and Catherine Booth." Each area of field had a small memorial to the Christian that had harvested so diligently in it. Most of the names I had never heard of before. Others I had only heard or read before in books and memoirs such as, "Jim Elliot," "Hudson Taylor," and "D.L. Moody."
I continued to walk, observing each harvested area, and finally I stopped to pray in another clearing. I prayed out loud, "Lord, let there be a small memory of my work on this earth as well. Whether it is to be read by others or not, let my short life mean something even as these others before me have." I remembered the prayer of David and I said it out loud: "Lord, remind me how brief my time on earth will be. Remind me that my days are numbered—how fleeting my life is." (Psalm 39:4)
Vision of the Lonely Christ
I stubbornly left this last patch of harvested wheat, not wanting to depart, somehow thinking that one of these great harvesters would step out of the field to meet me. No one did. I was once again drawn to the lonely sentinel that worked in the field ahead. As I focused on the personage again, it didn't seem as far as it was before. I could now make out the face and appearance. It was Jesus. He was sweating and dirty, working vigorously and tirelessly. He looked up at me and wiped the sweat from His brow, and said, "So, pray earnestly to the Lord of the harvest to send out laborers into His harvest."
He had such a sad look on His face, yet I knew He was happy to see me. I had pressed on and not been deterred even by the glorious things I had glimpsed—the river, the saints before me, the angels and the woman that harvested. I had pressed into the field even beyond the frightening cloud that had tried to stop me. He spoke again, "Awake you that sleep, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give you light" (Ephesians 5:14). I was awake.
I knew this was a prophetic panorama of the great harvest of humanity that Jesus had spoken of in the Bible. It was also a stark revelation of the utter lack of laborers despite over 2,000 years of enterprise. Now after all that I had seen in this vision, nothing could compare to the lonely anguished look on Jesus' face as He invited me into "the fellowship of His suffering." I remembered in the garden of Gethsemane He had asked His disciples to pray with Him in that, His darkest hour. Now, He is not only requesting us to pray with Him but to work with Him in the harvest fields of the world—the colossal expanse of human life where the more than half of earth's populations has never even heard of or extolled the name of Jesus Christ.
As this vision was ending, Jesus stopped toiling for a moment and looked back at me with a look of kindness. He handed me His threshing instrument and said almost in a whisper, "Ask of Me, and I shall give you the heathen for your inheritance, and the uttermost parts of the earth for your possession" (Psalm 2:8).
I bowed down greatly.
Chad Taylor
Consuming Fire Ministries
Email: info@consumingfire.com
Monday, July 26, 2010
In the Arms of Jesus
When I was reflecting this morning on all the extreme storms, testing, trials, and tons of raindrop days I have been through. I caught myself smiling and being totally grateful for it all. Because all those tough times forced me into the arms of my sweet Jesus—I had forgotten how beautiful a place it is to be in His arms. How much peace comes with being wrapped in His Presence. I learned some painful lessons, but they are lessons learned and mistakes, by God’s grace and power, I will not make again.
“But God had a purpose for this heartbreak experience…and it was through this, the death of my vision, the death of my way, that He really became even more real in my life”
The above quote was in a book I read recently and it spoke so deeply to my heart I had to share it! God has a purpose and plan for every heartbreak experience we have to face during our life here on earth. Whether it is due to your own mistakes or something life throws at you—He was a plan to use it to better you! Which goes to shows that my plans are not God’s plans. God control the pen of my life story.
The AMAZING thing is that even during our short comings, our mistakes, our sinful flesh: God is good. ALL THE TIME! Honestly, He makes ALL things work together for our (those who love and put their trust in Him) good! God even uses our brokenness and turns into something beautiful! He is God. He is good. He can do what He wants when He wants how He wants. He is God and He gives life. If God is for us, who can be against us? He is alive and working on our behalf at all times. He makes all things work together for our good.
“Simply put, if you are not willing to take what is dearest to you, whether plans or people, and kiss it goodbye, you can’t be my disciple” ~Luke 14:33 MSG
I have been reading tons of convicting, soul stirring books and Scripture lately. It leaves a lot on my heart and mind that I need to process through. Fill me with your Spirit Father. I’m so done with myself. I want to be over with MY will, MY dreams, MY ideas, MY plans. I want YOU! All of You!
Absolute surrender is a daily decision. I need to keep fighting. Keep pressing on. Not with my own strength and energy but with God’s. Everything that I am learning and all the resources He has given me, is going to take all summer to work and pray through. This is a summer of solitude, serving and going deeper with Jesus. Where will that bring me to? I have no idea. But I have full confidence that He will guide me to what His will for me is. He will open doors and continue to show me what His plans for my life are.
As a result of all this, my prayer for this summer after such a trial filled spring is…
God, don’t let me go back to normal. Let me keep running towards You. I don’t want to think that I can make it on my own and leave the peace and strength that I have being in Your arms. To continue keeping my gaze--my eyes fixed on my precious Jesus. I love you dearly! I adore you! You are absolutely all I want. Make me ablaze for you like never before. I want to sparkle with Christ. Showcase the radiance of Christ. To have you consuming more of my life every day! Continue to give me the wisdom, strength and energy to process and really take in all that you are showing me during this season of serving and solitude. All praise, glory and honor to the wonderful name of the Most High King!
Monday, July 19, 2010
Ridin' Solo????
“Today God has called me to be content as a single. So today, I am going to be the happiest single alive!! I am going to accomplish the most for God that is possible because He walks at my side” ~ Melody.
Though the world would say I am “riding solo” that couldn’t be further from the truth. No, no, no I am not riding solo I am riding with God! God is what honestly makes me the happiest single alive. My God is sooo good! He is truly all I need. The Lord God is my everything. I love Him with every beat of my heart, every piece of my soul, every neuron in my mind, and every ounce of my strength. He is my Forever Love! An earthly love story would just be extra and only to be a reflection of the amazing love adventure I have with Jesus!
God has made me a radiant, purpose filled daughter of the Most High King! Jesus is the ONLY reason why the light of God dances in my eyes. HE put it there!! I think Leslie Ludy nails explaining God’s purpose for being single when she wrote:
“In your single years, more than ever, you have the ability to give your life for them; to pour out your time, energy, love, and resources to those that have God’s special favor…the poor (not just poor in money, but poor in spirit, love, hope…). Are you using this gift for the benefit of those in need, or are you wasting it on yourself?”
I believe God has a higher calling for me right now than spending all my time and energy trying to find “Mr. Right”. I will not sit around waiting for my Prince Charming! Instead I will embrace the fact that God wants to use me now! Yes, I believe that he has a beautiful earthly love story planned out for me. But I also believe that I don’t have to wait around for it! God wants me to allow HIM to live, love and touch lives through me right now and to continue to seek Him and find Him to be the GREATEST treasure in the world. Your relationship with the Lord is the most important thing! Everything else will flow out of it!
I started to believe that a Christ-built Warrior Poet man didn’t exist. But oh they sure do! God has been showing me that He has one out there for me somewhere. Maybe you are reading this and have absolutely no idea what I mean by a Christ-built Warrior Poet; well let me explain!
Before I start let me tell you that as a daughter of the King you should NOT (I repeat DO NOT) settle for anything less than a Christ-built Warrior Poet. Know that this person will make mistakes; this isn’t some fairy tale man who is absolutely perfect. However, this shouldn’t bother you because you already have your fairy tale story with a person who is absolutely flawless and loves you like no man on earth ever could…JESUS!
The characteristics of a Christ-built Warrior Poet are...he spends hours on his knees in private prayer and worship of our King, fights for the cause of the least and outcast of the world, pours out his life to build up the Kingdom of God, he will be the initiator and you will be the responder, he will have a deep love, passion and devotion for Christ. His confidence, strength and boldness will all come from God. It will be one constant adventure being with a Christ-built Warrior Poet. You could spend hours with a guy like this and leave not thinking about how great he is but how great GOD is! Just being around him will encourage you to grow closer with Jesus! He will be willing to pour out his life for Christ, but also can express and vocalize his heart and show sensitivity to your world. A Christ-built Warrior Poet is a leader, a man of integrity, selfless, courageous, and compassionate, a pursuer, a protector, an adventurer, a warrior, a world changer, a gentleman and has a personal and close relationship with Christ.
So there you have it…that’s what I believe when it comes to earthly love stories. God will write your love story in HIS perfect timing. But I also know that I may never have an earthly love story. And that is completely okay! I am totally satisfied with God alone. I know His plans for me are for my good. God is for me. Therefore, I will always trust his judgment and plans for my life.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Prinking
This week I have been a leader at my church’s Vacation Bible School. It is definitely what I love to do! Working with kids, loving on them and best of all teaching them about my beloved Savior!! Since I love it soo much I pour out every drop of my energy and love on these kids and I get wiped out. But every morning when I get up early to have my Jesus time before I leave for camp--God fills me right back up again! I have caught myself praying this week that He would show up to VBS and work through me as I love and teach these kids about Him. Then I realized today that I just need to keep breathing in His love and grace. To know I don’t have to pray for God to show up today because God has invited me to be apart of this ministry. Of course He will show up and lead me. This isn’t about me or what I’m doing. It is about God and HIS plans and will. I am just honored to be invited and come along for the ride and to have Him use me in all this.
“Too often we face our future not with a sense of who He is and what He is calling us to, but with who we are and what we are capable of”
I struggle back and forth with this is my faith walk. I know what I am good at; I know what I am passionate for, I know who I am. So I try to plan my life around this information and figure it must be what God wants. But that just isn’t always true. My life isn’t about me and accomplishing things out of my power and talents but God’s power and His plans. I am a planner. It just who I am. It is a great gift to have in ministry work because there is so much planning to be done. But I often carry that over into my life and have to have my life planned out. I need to know where I am going to college, what I am going to do, where I am going to travel…the list goes on and on. This summer I am learning to live each day to the fullest and to live ONE DAY AT A TIME! It sounds like an easy goal but it is honestly really hard.
I catch myself planning my life all the time. I think it has to be what God wants without ever really spend a lot of hours in prayer and reading and meditating on scripture. In other words, I didn’t prink about it very well. Prinking is one of my new favorite words. It is praying + thinking biblically (reading scriptures). I am trying to work on prinking about everything before I say yes to something or start planning. I find tons of comfort in this verse:
Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” ~Proverbs 19:21
Oh Lord please let your purpose prevail in my life. If my plans don’t match with Yours then don’t let them happen. Am I truly following YOUR Will or am I doing my own will and calling it yours? Keep working in my life and heart to make Your plans, desires and dreams. My plans, desires and dreams.
Totally off topic but I want to share my beautiful God moment of the month! My mom was talking to my sick Great Grandmother in the hospital and telling her that I feel called to work with orphans around the world and to start my own non profit. She said it with a HUGE smile on her face and with her full support.
What a mega unexpected blessing that was! I knew that this life God has called me to would not be easy. I knew that people would disapprove and not understand. I always expected the worst. But I am just in amazement in how you have worked in my mom’s heart! Reminds me of this quote from missionary, Bethany Haley:
“Realizing more and more that I am less blown away at God’s hand in my life. Not because He is less amazing—but because I’m expecting His hand around every corner more and more.”
The meditations God has put on my heart this week! Will you join me in praying that we would make sure that we are following God’s plans and not our own?
Point out the road I must travel; I'm all ears, all eyes before You. Teach me how to live to please You because you're my God. ~Psalm143:8&10
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