Winter Reflections

I am completely enthralled by the Winter Wonderland that I have had the magical privilege of living in the past few days! The white world outside my window is glorious. Beholding the exquisite and breathtaking scene from the warm comfort of my quaint dorm room. What a gift from our Marvelous Creator God! "...For God says to the snow, 'Fall on the earth." ~Job 37:6.

There is something so beautiful about snow. It makes everything seem new, bright, fresh and completely transformed in the midst of a season of lifeless dormancy. A white blanket of possibilities has fallen all-around us. One of a kind delicate snowflakes fall softly to be married to the ground. Seattle snow is a kind of forced, but welcomed Sabbath. Everything shuts down and slows down. People are forced to find a place of rest. The hectic pace of life no longer a burden. God brings snow and I now can actually enjoy the simple pleasures of the breath filling my lungs, the lovely people by my side, and dwelling on the good faithfulness of a God who weaves it all together. Faint laughter from my college peers snowball fights or screams of joy as they find the courage to sled down one of the many massive hills on campus. I can imagine God looking down and enjoying the childlike joy that has come from His snowy gift.

I am inspired. Inspired to cocoon myself in a myriad of heavy blankets and quilts and lie in my cozy bed and write. Write about what God has been doing in my life…what He has been showing me. In the hopes that it would help spur and encourage you in someway towards seeking after God more in your own life. However, first and foremost, I encourage you to read the Bible. God’s words are far more brilliant, inspiring and encouraging than mine. His words are alive and moving.

Who likes a Christian without a sense of humor? Answer: Hardly anyone. That being said, I don't expect you to agree with everything I type. In fact, I'd rather you not. Life is in need of those stimulating debates that anger and annoy our opinions and challenge our beliefs. I think it only makes you stronger in your opinions and beliefs. However, I want to be known for my strong convictions in debates and discussion AND for my gentleness in letting others keep theirs. By always having that be my goal, it creates a beautiful vision of the Kingdom of God. God has been teaching me a lot about relationships and love recently.

I’ve never had a boyfriend. I have never been a dater. I rarely get asked out…very rarely. What I use to see as rejection, God has showed me is actually His grace. Oh, I have had my share of heart-sparkles! But in God’s immense and exasperated patience, He keeps His hand of daily protection watchfully over me. So instead of dating or being in a relationship, I get the privilege of spend my days looking for places to be useful in His name and advancing the Kingdom. God can use my life for HIS glory, as long as I am willing.

I have often heard the phrase, “Chase butterflies. Not Boys.” It’s cute and clever, but I think there is an even better objective to chase because I know it won’t be long before I get bored from chasing butterflies. Here is my version—Chase after God. Not Boys. Chase after God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength. That’s what it means to be kingdom minded. I can promise you if you are seeking after God and His kingdom you will NEVER get bored.

The greatest romance one can find, is to fall in love with God. The greatest journey one could embark on is to seek Him. The greatest achievement one can obtain is to find Him. ~St. Augustine

Someone asked me yesterday if I thought I would have a boyfriend by the end of the school year. Somehow by the grace of God I told them that all I know is that for TODAY God has called me to be content as a single college age girl. And that TODAY, I am going to be the happiest single alive!! I am going to accomplish the most for God that is possible because He walks at my side..."Seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness...do not worry about tomorrow...each day has enough trouble of its own." ~Matthew 6:33-34

“People aren’t problems to be fixed. People are people, for us to walk alongside and journey with and help pick up the pieces with and, when they drop them again, to get back down and help them pick them up again. And that’s real love - without condition and without expectation.”

~Brooke Fraser

I believe what screws us up most in life is our expectations, the picture in our head of how life is supposed to be, especially in relationships. Expectations kill relationships. This may seem silly but I have caught myself thinking when I was talking to a heart sparkle, “You are not responding in the way I imagined you would respond when I acted out this conversation in my head. Stop it.” I think the things we want most in life, the things we think will set us free, are not the things we need. Most people crave an earthly love story so strongly which is a good and healthy desire, but it can too easily become an idol in your life. An idol always demands sacrifices. Expectations that I have for the different relationships in my life tend to turn into idols. And when these idols are not being fulfilled I sacrifice the people in my life to my expectations (or idols) through withholding my love, reckless and hurt filled words, or anger and rage. What (or better stated who) can save me from my idolatrous heart?

Biblical love that Jesus talks about and is notorious in 1 Corinthians 13 is acceptance, grace, honor, and trust—among many other things—that you give to someone without having expectations of receiving anything in return. Did you get that? NO EXPECATATIONS, just freely given love. No pretensions just real and vulnerable love. This is the kind of love that is everlasting; a love that doesn’t fit the mold of normalcy and throws away all sense of reason. It is the kind of love I believe is found in Heaven and it is the kind of love that lasts. The presence of this kind of love is warm, inviting and melting. It’s the kind of love that I cannot understand but I know that I want more than anything in the world. My theory is that deep down, hidden in the most secret places of our hearts, we are all seeking someone who can relate to us, meet us where we are, love us in spite of our junk and do so without any expectations. Because that’s what love is, right?

This kind of radical love does not come easy for us. It is something that’s not just going to happen when you enter into a relationship. It is something that you must learn and practice.

“Living a great love story doesn’t look like winning the lottery, it looks like training for a marathon. It’s hard work and you have to do the work long before you ever meet Mr. Right, otherwise you’ll be the girl who shows up for the marathon having eaten a gallon of ice cream every night, listening to Taylor Swift songs and watching love stories about vampires. No good man can run with that girl, not for much longer than a mile” -Don Miller

I have discovered the best way to cleanse an idolatrous heart and to learn and practice daily this profound love that holds no expectations is through a relationship with Jesus Christ.

Jesus is the song of love that never leaves my heart. It draws me in, captivated by the heavy scent of God. The notes of the song God’s sings over me linger. The melody drifting and I keep seeking for more. It’s my obsession. I’m spellbound by the presence of God. Transfixed and mesmerized by the song of Jesus, God’s anointed. The heavy glory of God’s presence is my drug, my addiction. I recently discovered the Hebrew word use throughout scriptures to describe God's glory is "kabod" which is derived from the root word meaning "heaviness". All of the earth is heavy with God's glory like gravity keeping me firmly footed on the ground. That makes sense to me. There are moments that I can feel God’s glory heavy on my skin. The weight of God’s glory is not unreal, deceptive, misleading, or short-lived, but daily and everywhere.

God’s love is waking my heart to life. My relationship with Jesus is making my eyes sparkle with the light of Christ, has placed an every present smile on my face, and a spirit that glows like a healing fire. God daily makes me more and more like the women found throughout the Bible: giving me a boldness like Esther, the beauty and faithfulness like Sarah and Rebecca, the warm radiance of Ruth, the hospitality of Lydia, the humble spirit of Mary, a sensitive heart to justice engulfed by tears of constant prayer like Hannah, drenching me in Proverbs 31, providing me with steadfast faith and the redeeming leadership of Mary Magdalene, the courage and wisdom of Deborah, and audacity and tenacity of Tamar.

I'm starting to understand that the beauty of an earthly love story is in the whole process, the waiting part too, not just the end result. Because marriage is not my destination, it will just one day import how I travel on my journey.

“And there is something so alluring about a woman whose focus is on knowing God! While a woman who is “out to get” a man seems to give off an aura of desperation, a woman who is out to know and serve her Savior gives off a fragrance of beauty These are the years of growing into the beauty for which God created you. Years for becoming lovely in everyway. In God’s time, He may bring someone across your path who delights in your beauty, someone who needs what you have to offer, someone who will move Heaven and Earth to make sure he’s up to the challenge of loving you the way God intended you to be loved.” ~Diana Comer

As the gentle white flowers continue to fall from the storehouses in heaven with the sweet refreshing scent of winter, I end my reflective thoughts with a wonderful passage of scripture that has been my inspiration and keeping me “Kingdom Minded.”

Sometimes I wish everyone was single like me-a simpler life in many ways! God gives the gift of the single life to some, the gift of the married life to others…and don’t be wishing you were someplace else or with someone else. Where you are right now is God’s place for you. Live and obey and love and believe right there. God, not your marital status, define your life….The really important thing is obeying God’s call, following His commands…because of the current pressures on us from all sides, I think it would probably be best to stay just as you are…All I am saying is that when you marry, you take on additional stress in an already stressful time, and I want to spare you if possible…There is no time to waste, so don’t complicate you lives unnecessarily…When you’re unmarried you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. ~1 Corinthians 7 (Message)